Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.
Gloria Steinem
A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
Helen Rowland
New study out men. Listen up here now. It has just been discovered after extensive research done on 130 newly wed couples, by psychologist John Gottman of the University of Washington that, & I quote; ÒIf you want your marriage to last, just give into her... just do what your wife says.Ó
Excuse me?
Well I donÕt know about Dr.Õ spineless jellyfishÕ Gottman there but I for one wear the....
ÒWhatÕs that dear?
ÒChange ChristoÕs diaper?Ó....Ówell IÕm right in the middle ofÓ....ÓYes love.Ó
Where was I? Oh yeah. DonÕt tell my wife this, but I have always been the decision maker in this family, & I donÕt care if every damn Ph.D. this side of Vassar tells me IÕm...
Ò WHAT? Yes my sweet, I warmed up your car!Ó
ÒYes of course I sat in the seat till it was warm for you!Ó
Anyway Dr. Gottman, (Fop-man) goes on to say that if you can ÒGenuinely listen & be empathetic when you are the target of the complaint, that can be very powerful.Ó
Well gag me with a ring finger, what ever happened to the club & the cave approach?
I read on: ÒThe problem is that most people meet anger with angerÓ
Just what does he mean ÔmostÕ people here do you suppose?
IÕd say just about everybody but a select group of eunuchs on prozac meet anger with anger.
So then Doctor Proctor says that the successful husband must become Òemotionally intelligent & accept a wifeÕs influence... find something reasonable in your partners complaint to agree with.Ó
The guy is obviously not married....other wise he would know that many times there is NOTHING ÔreasonableÕ in your partners complaint.....
ÒWHAT? OF COURSE IÕM NOT WRITING ABOUT YOU, LOVE!Ó
It seems marriage counselors for years have taught Ôactive listeningÕ in other words both parties were told to sit down & really listen to what the other was saying. Well pal, you can now throw that right out the window. In fact it is now believed that ÒThe entire enterprise of marriage counseling is in crisis for one simple reason.
You either agree with her buddy, or your dead meat....is now what the ÔprofessionalsÕ are saying.
Hey...what the heck ever happened to... MALE, the more dominant of the species...John Wayne...Me Tarzan, you Jane?
I decided to take this a step farther & look up the problem in my favorite reference guide; the 1952 Encyclopedia Americana. An imitation leather clad group of books which were no doubt written by men, for men when testosterone ran as thick as brilcream & wasnÕt a filthy, uncomfortable word.
Marriage: Based on the mutual attraction & consent of both parties, almost always the male is the wooer... AH HA!! I knew it....
HOWEVER! The female, by having the right to accept or reject a lover, played the decisive role in mate selection......
This is not exactly what I was looking for.
ÔWife Capture & Wife PurchaseÕ....
Now weÕre talking....I read on. ..Õwas regarded as exceptional & of minor importance in preliterate societies.Õ
So, I was born to late...
ÒWHAT DEAR?Ó YES THEREÕS A LITTLE MONEY IN MY WALLET!Ó
ÒOF COURSE YOU CAN HAVE IT ALL!Ó....Ówhat do I need money for, just eat or pay some bills...NOTHING DEAR!Ó
ÔMarriage may be defined as a more or less durable unionÕ...the Americana says...Õbetween man & woman. Studies reveal this union is common among higher mammals such as chimpanzees, being monogamous & durable.Õ
And that, ladies & germs, is what they knew in 1952.
They now know that the female of the chimpanzee species is one of the hottest little harlots in the animal kingdom, doing whatever with whomever she pleases.
Could it be my fellow fellows, that we have only been led to believe that we are in charge of anything here? Or in fact have even a scant handle on the entire sordid affair?
Naaaa.
ÒCOMING DEAR!Ó
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